Control vs Flexibility

Debbie Butler
1 min readApr 29, 2020

It is easy to try and force things around what you want them to be and control them. For example, the reactions of people. There is a myriad of ways that you could try to make everything suit you. With control you are determined that your outcome will be what you imagine, and you measure your success against this goal. Nothing ever turns out how you want it to. Planning and control are faulty ideas.
Yet this does not allow for growth. When things are controlled, they have no opportunity for growth, and things that are carefully controlled tend to end in failure.
The alternative to this is flexibility, where you are not attached to the outcome. Flexibility allows for growth, change and development, without expectation. Simply observe yourself in the situation and allow everything else to be. Measure yourself by how much pleasure you are getting rather than your imagination of what others might think of you. This is true power and mastery of yourself as well as your outcomes.

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Debbie Butler
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Deborah is a psychologist who uses philosophers such as Gurdjieff, Spinoza, and Schopenhauer, Zen, and the Stoics in her approach to healing.